ironpony
Professional Pot-Stirrer
I'm sure Boris could round up some of the collective!
I've been home since Monday. My truck and trailer is falling apart. I've let so many little things go it's overwhelming. I pulled into my parking spot at home and looked at the chrome Western Star sign thing on the side of my hood and it was leaking oil like it was crying. WTF? I open the hood and my oil filler plug is gone. It was even chained permentally to the truck and it looks like it was surgically removed. Oil everywhere! Hood spring broke. Front end out of align and truck shaking down the road. Front tires no good except for trailer use. Holes in deck of flatbed because forklift could not stay on metal runners. Both rubber hood tits that hood sits down into both broken. Passenger side WW spring gone. Bent metal tray on back of cab where air lines and electrical connections go from when I disconnected my trailer and pulled away without unhooking them. Steps rattling. Front grill support bar broken. Trailer tire looks good then I notice one spot where metal cord is showing!!! WTF? Lights out on dash gauges. Shift boot split and dust coming in. Rigmaster won't start. Girlfriend announced she is now a lesbian.
So, I have a friend who is a boss here in town for a nationwide trucking company to haul beer from the Bud plant to other bud plants from VA to OH. 5 days a week and home on weekends. He's been after me for a while. They need 5 new drivers right now and in a bind so I figure I'll sign on and let my mechanic go at my truck and trailer front to back but still keep my authority up.
He says great but I have to get a physical. I say, I already have a 2 year card I just got. He says you need one from us and a drug test. Ok, no problem. He says it's being done at Concentra. I was like great, they HATE truck drivers. They only gave my friend a one year medical because he had a bump on his finger and said it could flare up at any time. I went their once and they tried to give me crap about anything and everything.
So, I show up and everything was by the book. The doctor had an attitude right off the bat. Then he has me sign all these papers for everything under the sun. I had to go on a step up and down so many times then he would measure my heart rate and how long before it came down. I was like what the F is this. This is not required by the DOT. It also said I had to lift 50 pound weights for a period of time and a whole bunch of other stuff. The I flip the page and there's a sleep apnea form and he says they require that too. At that point I said in a nice way, F U. I'm outta here.
They immediately called my friend like he was my mother and he's telling on me. I was pissed. My buddy said screw all that, you already have your medical. I go back for the driving test. They had a brand new Freightliner for me with sleeper. I get in and they have one of their drivers take me out. He tells me to hook up to a trailer and I do. I ace the driving test but the truck was a piece of crap. 10 speed real hard to **** and if you go above 1,400 rpms's it shuts down. You can't put the seat back. No room. No fridge. No APU. No Inverter NO NOTHING!!!! No idling and the AC is battery powered. REALLY. That was it. This blows.
So now my mechanic who is really retired and loves to take his time has a short list of must be fixed items then back on the road.
It kinda stands out of the rest of the post.I post all that crap and you comment on that!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol
How they gonna get the air in 'em? I mean.....It kinda stands out of the rest of the post.
Lesbian blow-up dolls, ... now I've seen everything.
All you gotta do is say "marriage is between a man & a woman" in the presence of the lesbian blow-up doll & it'll instantly become full of hot air.How they gonna get the air in 'em? I mean.....
cuz they don't do that.