Southern Fried
Well-Known Member
Cripes Duck..... you have worse luck than I do. Do me a favor, buy a Powerball ticket.... with your luck I'll win.
Quack 20
- Thread starter Duck
- Start date
Cripes Duck..... you have worse luck than I do. Do me a favor, buy a Powerball ticket.... with your luck I'll win.
Duck
Sarcastic remark goes here
Got my laptop set up in the smoking section at my grandma's house.
Got here at 6AM. Just woke up. I had the alarm on my phone set for 1:30 PM but it didn't do me much good because I had to leave the phone on the charger in the car.
Now I'm fixin' to head over to the hospital.
I said "fixin'" because I'm in Tennessee and that's how y'alls talks around here. I just drank a glass of coffee but they'd probably call that "coke" down here.
My sister is angry. I sent her a text asking if they were at the hospital yet & she said "boot store". So I replied & told her that I told the Geezer to pick her up at the airport with my grandma's car so she wouldn't squawk about the smoke smell in mine. She objected to my use of the word "squawk".
I think she's still mad because I called her a Nazi yesterday. She actually said "When you and Dad get down there, put your suitcases in the garage & I'll wash your clothes when I get there because even though they're clean they'll still smell like cigarette smoke". I said "Few things in life are more annoying than ex-smokers who become anti-smoking Nazi's".
That text wasn't received very well either,
Got here at 6AM. Just woke up. I had the alarm on my phone set for 1:30 PM but it didn't do me much good because I had to leave the phone on the charger in the car.
Now I'm fixin' to head over to the hospital.
I said "fixin'" because I'm in Tennessee and that's how y'alls talks around here. I just drank a glass of coffee but they'd probably call that "coke" down here.
My sister is angry. I sent her a text asking if they were at the hospital yet & she said "boot store". So I replied & told her that I told the Geezer to pick her up at the airport with my grandma's car so she wouldn't squawk about the smoke smell in mine. She objected to my use of the word "squawk".
I think she's still mad because I called her a Nazi yesterday. She actually said "When you and Dad get down there, put your suitcases in the garage & I'll wash your clothes when I get there because even though they're clean they'll still smell like cigarette smoke". I said "Few things in life are more annoying than ex-smokers who become anti-smoking Nazi's".
That text wasn't received very well either,
Duck
Sarcastic remark goes here
I guess I won't know til I quit screwin' around on my laptop & head over there. The hospital is only about 2 miles away. By the time the engine warms up, I'm there.
If I'd ended up needing to send you to pick up my sister, it would've been PERFECT if you'd have brought your pickup truck & brought the dogs, ... and maybe top it off with flags attached to poles in your truck's stake pockets. Confederate flag on one side, Gadsden flag on the other.
(She lived in California & Washington state for a number of years & it damaged her brain.)
Duck
Sarcastic remark goes here
Can't sleep.
So I got up. Went outside 4 a smoke. Noticed an old globe on a shelf in my grandma's garage on my way back inside. I took it down & through the dust on top I could see that it was from before the fall of the Soviet Union.
So I brought it inside & cleaned it but couldn't find a copyright date.
So I spent about 2 hours looking at it & searching Wikipedia for country names that had changed since my globe at home was made 3 years ago. So far I've narrowed it down to between 1984 and 1989. Below are my notes. Everything is crossed out except for the oldest possible date, and the most recent possible date. For example, when I learned that Burma became "Myanmar" in 1989, it made the merging of north & south Yemen in 1990 irrelevant. The globe must be from before 1989.
Zaire - 1971 - 1997
China took Hong Kong back in 1997
Burkina Faso - named Aug 1984
Soviet fall Dec 91
In 1990, the two governments reached a full agreement on the joint governing of Yemen, and the countries were merged on 22 May 1990
Burma became Myanmar in 1989.
Tibet took over by PRC in 1951.
Yugoslavia died in 1991.
Czechoslovakia died in 1993.
Niue independent from NZ in 1974.
Hopefully I'll get the time to get to the bottom of this pointless riddle before I go home.
So I got up. Went outside 4 a smoke. Noticed an old globe on a shelf in my grandma's garage on my way back inside. I took it down & through the dust on top I could see that it was from before the fall of the Soviet Union.
So I brought it inside & cleaned it but couldn't find a copyright date.
So I spent about 2 hours looking at it & searching Wikipedia for country names that had changed since my globe at home was made 3 years ago. So far I've narrowed it down to between 1984 and 1989. Below are my notes. Everything is crossed out except for the oldest possible date, and the most recent possible date. For example, when I learned that Burma became "Myanmar" in 1989, it made the merging of north & south Yemen in 1990 irrelevant. The globe must be from before 1989.
China took Hong Kong back in 1997
Burkina Faso - named Aug 1984
In 1990, the two governments reached a full agreement on the joint governing of Yemen, and the countries were merged on 22 May 1990
Burma became Myanmar in 1989.
Hopefully I'll get the time to get to the bottom of this pointless riddle before I go home.
Duck
Sarcastic remark goes here
Persia has been officially named Iran since 1935, so no.
Duck
Sarcastic remark goes here
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Iran
I think you're right, ... or maybe it changed from Persia to Iran in 1935 and then changed to "Islamic Republic of Iran" in 1980.
I don't remember where I found that it was 1935. But here's the Iran wikipedia page. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Iran
But this page says 1935: http://www.thefreedictionary.com/Persia
I don't have time to figure it out.
I was just told to grab a strongbox out of a bedroom in my grandma's house containing her living will & bring it to the hospital.... doesn't sound good.
Blood
Driveler Emeritus
I've got a pal who immigrated from Iran during the hostage crisis.
He was 16 years old.
His dad was a banker working outside the country and when the American hostages were taken his dad put him on a plane that ended up in Chicago , gave him a brief case loaded with green-backs and told him, "Don't call us, we'll call you. These lunatics may well get us all killed."
Anyway, I heard him reply to queries about his home country as Persia...
hoping to avoid some of the fallout for being from Iran.
He was planning his first trip back just prior to 9/11.
He didn't end up getting to go until about 3 years ago...
when his mother was on her death-bed.
He is a great American.
More deserving of the title than about 2/3's of our current population.
He was 16 years old.
His dad was a banker working outside the country and when the American hostages were taken his dad put him on a plane that ended up in Chicago , gave him a brief case loaded with green-backs and told him, "Don't call us, we'll call you. These lunatics may well get us all killed."
Anyway, I heard him reply to queries about his home country as Persia...
hoping to avoid some of the fallout for being from Iran.
He was planning his first trip back just prior to 9/11.
He didn't end up getting to go until about 3 years ago...
when his mother was on her death-bed.
He is a great American.
More deserving of the title than about 2/3's of our current population.
Blood
Driveler Emeritus
No.
That was 24 hour news feed sensationalism.
Although one of the principal dialects is still known as Persian.
I remember well watching Night Line every night back then.
What I most remember about that is my bro-in-law storming into the house and asking,
HAVE YOU HEARD??
Heard what?
YOU BETTER GET YOUR HOUSE IN ORDER AND STAND BY!!
'cause why??
THE S*** JUST HIT THE FAN, THAT''S WHY!!
What happened?
WAR IS WHAT HAPPENED!!
Say what?
YOU'RE STILL RESERVE, RIGHT??
No. I was only inactive reserve and that ended last year.
DOESN'T MATTER!!
WE CAN'T RUN A WAR WITH A BUNCH OF FRESH RECRUITS!!!
By the time he got around to telling me what was going on, I thought maybe there nukes in the air targeting every major city in the country.
Duck
Sarcastic remark goes here
After 8:30, the main entrance to the hospital my grandma is at is closed. Gotta go in through the emergency entrance.
So I was outside the ER in the smoking section with the geezer & my motormouth cousin Randy, who never stops talking because he's got some SEEEERRRRIOUS ADHD, ..
A white conversion van with "PLAYBOY" on the bug shield was parked at the ER outside the entrance. My cousin says he knows of the guy & he's a paraplegic pimp. I could see the wheelchair lift stuff in it. But yes, he's a pimp.
A blonde teenage girl got out of it & went inside, then came out a minute later. The van moved about 100 feet and stopped, then the girl got out again & walked right past us to talk to a chubby brunette teenage girl who was standing near the ER entrance. I got a good look at the blonde as she walked past. Nice looking girl, .. looked to be between 14 & 17. Had a cute little hat on, kinda reminded me of Punky Brewster. (If you don't remember who Punky Brewster is, you're either too young or too old.) But she looked like she was crying. And she was barefoot. Then she went back & got in the van. It moved a little & she had to speed up & kinda chase it. Right as she was getting back into the van I took this picture, attempting to get the license plate. I could tell it came out blurry & there wasn't time to re-focus so I just typed it into a text message addressed to my friend Kelly but saved it in "drafts". Tennessee DW9609.
I told the cop inside the ER and he didn't give a damn.
Seriously?? A cop doesn't give a damn that a girl who looks like she's a high school student got into a van belonging to a guy known to be a pimp, and somebody standing right in front of him has a picture of the vehicle and a license plate number?? WTF. This was a Maury County Sheriff's Deputy. He said he'd put the word out to patrol but didn't even give enough of a crap to ask for the license number or give me a number or e-mail address to send the pic to. But he did say he knows the van & the driver & said the rumor my cousin told me about him being a pimp is true.
2 hours later, I'm back outside with my sister & my motormouth cousin & two other teenage girls came out of the ER. One of them was the brunette that the blonde had went up to, and the other was in a wheelchair & looked to be about 12 years old. Well this is odd as hell because who the hell's 12 yr old daughter gets discharged from the ER without her parents being with her, . . just one of her friends or something. So I told my sister & cousin "if that white van comes back, my car is parked right there (pointing at it) I'm gonna park it right here & block the exit (one way in, one way out by that entrance) until some cops check IDs". Well it looked like there might've been a back way out, so I walked over there to be sure. While I did that, I noticed there was a fat nasty woman sitting on a curb with no pants on. I just glanced to my left & saw panties & blubber. NEED BRAIN BLEACH. But by the time I was returning to where my sister & cousin were standing, those other two girls were gone. I assumed they went back into the ER.
Right then a car pulled up. A burgundy GM product like a late 90's Lumina or something. 4-door. We didn't pay much attention at first. Just another car pulling up to the ER. Had two occupants. Both men in their 50's. No big deal.
Til I heard a crying girl & looked over & saw that same blonde girl from earlier getting into the back of that car. No idea how she got back there, ... but we'd been inside the ICU for a couple hours since she'd left in the van. I couldn't get my phone out of my pocket & get it in focus in time so I just typed the license number into a blank text message & saved it. Tennessee F17 07F. My sister went & flagged down two city cops & one of them immediately knew who the girl was we were talking about. He even knew her name, and that she's 18 years old, and has a rap sheet for prostitution "going back a few years".
HELLO!!! She's 18 NOW, and her rap sheet for prostitution GOES BACK A FEW YEARS??? How the hell does a girl under 18 get charged with prostitution??? If she's under 18 she's not out there on her own free will. But the cop said that she comes to the ER just about every night trying to score narcotic pain meds & they always turn her down. No idea why she keeps coming back. Desperation maybe?
So anyway the cop walked around the corner of the building and checked where I'd spotted the fat blubberbutt with no pants on. There was a big puddle of mysterious smelly liquid right where she had been sitting on the edge of a curb in an ER handicap parking spot but she was gone. I recognized her when I spotted her inside the ER looking through the window. She had shorts on now. And she was standing right next to the entrance to the ladies room. Why in the hell would she go outside & pee on the parking lot when there's a bathroom right there inside the ER??
Crazy-ass people around here.
So I was outside the ER in the smoking section with the geezer & my motormouth cousin Randy, who never stops talking because he's got some SEEEERRRRIOUS ADHD, ..
A white conversion van with "PLAYBOY" on the bug shield was parked at the ER outside the entrance. My cousin says he knows of the guy & he's a paraplegic pimp. I could see the wheelchair lift stuff in it. But yes, he's a pimp.
A blonde teenage girl got out of it & went inside, then came out a minute later. The van moved about 100 feet and stopped, then the girl got out again & walked right past us to talk to a chubby brunette teenage girl who was standing near the ER entrance. I got a good look at the blonde as she walked past. Nice looking girl, .. looked to be between 14 & 17. Had a cute little hat on, kinda reminded me of Punky Brewster. (If you don't remember who Punky Brewster is, you're either too young or too old.) But she looked like she was crying. And she was barefoot. Then she went back & got in the van. It moved a little & she had to speed up & kinda chase it. Right as she was getting back into the van I took this picture, attempting to get the license plate. I could tell it came out blurry & there wasn't time to re-focus so I just typed it into a text message addressed to my friend Kelly but saved it in "drafts". Tennessee DW9609.
I told the cop inside the ER and he didn't give a damn.
Seriously?? A cop doesn't give a damn that a girl who looks like she's a high school student got into a van belonging to a guy known to be a pimp, and somebody standing right in front of him has a picture of the vehicle and a license plate number?? WTF. This was a Maury County Sheriff's Deputy. He said he'd put the word out to patrol but didn't even give enough of a crap to ask for the license number or give me a number or e-mail address to send the pic to. But he did say he knows the van & the driver & said the rumor my cousin told me about him being a pimp is true.
2 hours later, I'm back outside with my sister & my motormouth cousin & two other teenage girls came out of the ER. One of them was the brunette that the blonde had went up to, and the other was in a wheelchair & looked to be about 12 years old. Well this is odd as hell because who the hell's 12 yr old daughter gets discharged from the ER without her parents being with her, . . just one of her friends or something. So I told my sister & cousin "if that white van comes back, my car is parked right there (pointing at it) I'm gonna park it right here & block the exit (one way in, one way out by that entrance) until some cops check IDs". Well it looked like there might've been a back way out, so I walked over there to be sure. While I did that, I noticed there was a fat nasty woman sitting on a curb with no pants on. I just glanced to my left & saw panties & blubber. NEED BRAIN BLEACH. But by the time I was returning to where my sister & cousin were standing, those other two girls were gone. I assumed they went back into the ER.
Right then a car pulled up. A burgundy GM product like a late 90's Lumina or something. 4-door. We didn't pay much attention at first. Just another car pulling up to the ER. Had two occupants. Both men in their 50's. No big deal.
Til I heard a crying girl & looked over & saw that same blonde girl from earlier getting into the back of that car. No idea how she got back there, ... but we'd been inside the ICU for a couple hours since she'd left in the van. I couldn't get my phone out of my pocket & get it in focus in time so I just typed the license number into a blank text message & saved it. Tennessee F17 07F. My sister went & flagged down two city cops & one of them immediately knew who the girl was we were talking about. He even knew her name, and that she's 18 years old, and has a rap sheet for prostitution "going back a few years".
HELLO!!! She's 18 NOW, and her rap sheet for prostitution GOES BACK A FEW YEARS??? How the hell does a girl under 18 get charged with prostitution??? If she's under 18 she's not out there on her own free will. But the cop said that she comes to the ER just about every night trying to score narcotic pain meds & they always turn her down. No idea why she keeps coming back. Desperation maybe?
So anyway the cop walked around the corner of the building and checked where I'd spotted the fat blubberbutt with no pants on. There was a big puddle of mysterious smelly liquid right where she had been sitting on the edge of a curb in an ER handicap parking spot but she was gone. I recognized her when I spotted her inside the ER looking through the window. She had shorts on now. And she was standing right next to the entrance to the ladies room. Why in the hell would she go outside & pee on the parking lot when there's a bathroom right there inside the ER??
Crazy-ass people around here.
Duck
Sarcastic remark goes here
I just had to Google that.
I've been trying to think of a clever name for him all day. Actually it could be female, ... hard to tell. The jaw bone doesn't appear to be worn out from excessive talking, so it's probably male.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Similar threads
