Quack 20

[Duck]

I picked up a load in Cincinnati. I weighed my options for scaling it. I could backtrack to go scale it, take a southern route to Kentucky with a gutless underpowered truck, or risk the Indiana scale being open & head that way.

I went with my gut. I looked at the weight on the BOL. Saw inside the trailer when the guard took the "lot seal" off & put the real one on. Ran them all the way forward, then looked at the ground & watched it as I ran 'em back about 3 feet. Got out & looked at the truck from 100 feet away, got back in, air gauge said exactly 70 psi on the drives. I thought to myself "that shit's balanced perfect & my gross will be about 78-ish. So I headed out. Indiana scale was open but I got the green light on the pre-pass so I scaled it at the Petro at the 143, AFTER the DOT scale.



This is like the 90th time in a row that I've done that. I'm like a human Cat scale.

 

[Tim]

I like Cats.

Really?

 

[coachman]

And the great Duck made it through again LOL

 

[Duck]

I'd just started my day, drove 178 miles & sat for 2 hours in a loading dock drinking coffee til my pulse was in hummingbird mode & dispatch wanted me to start another break, using the 2 hours I'd already been sitting still, because it's the only way I could've gotten to a Tyson plant in time to leave with it in time to get to the receiver on time.

I said "this is why I don't drive for you people any more. I'm incapable of sleeping at the moment."
He says "well you don't have to sleep you just have to ...."
I says "and then afterwards, drive for 11 hours?"
He says "all the other guys have no problem with ..."
I says "You're either full of **** or you have a fleet full of narcoleptics".
He laughs, starts to say something & I said: "That or they lay there & try to sleep & then they drive dangerously tired all night because they're afraid of getting fired or something"
He says "hold on a minute"
He transfers the call to the retard in Iowa. As soon as I heard his voice I said "what a chicken ****!"
He says "who's a chicken ****?"
I says "(Kansas guy)"
He says "why"
I says "cuz he aint' got the balls to argue with me"
He says "over what?"
I says "Politics. he's a huge Obama fan"
He says "or this load out of Holcomb?"
I says "that too"
He says "what's the problem?"
I says "I just woke up & drove a measly stinkin' 3 hours & now he wants me to go back to sleep so I can drive all night".
He says "Most guys can do that, it's called trucking"
I said "It's called bull****"
He says "call it what you want, hold on... " (I hear typing) "looks like it's blah blah blah miles to blah blah blah if you finish your 10 there in Wichita you can blah blah blah then blah blah blah"
I says "either take me off this load or work it out so someone else can meet me in Omaha & take it cuz if I'm gonna be dispatched on this load I'm driving there now, during the day, ... when I'm wide awake, and safe"
He says "call (dumbass in Iowa) in the morning & let us know where you're at, I gotta go"
I says "ok, now was that so freakin' complicated?"
He says "you over-complicate things sometimes"
I says "only cuz you dispatchers are ****ing retards"
He says "yeah we're all retarded here in Iowa"
I says "and Kansas & Virginia too. But yeah, Iowa's the worst. Oh by the way, your trucks suck too"
He says "ok bye-bye"

-click-

Ok so now I'm 206 miles away from where I was earlier, parked near the Tyson crap-hole in western Kansas & I'm still not tired enough to sleep. The Ducks never sleeps. Unless I'm extremely tired, which I'm not.

 

[krelithous]

I'd just started my day, drove 178 miles & sat for 2 hours in a loading dock drinking coffee til my pulse was in hummingbird mode & dispatch wanted me to start another break, using the 2 hours I'd already been sitting still, because it's the only way I could've gotten to a Tyson plant in time to leave with it in time to get to the receiver on time.

I said "this is why I don't drive for you people any more. I'm incapable of sleeping at the moment."
He says "well you don't have to sleep you just have to ...."
I says "and then afterwards, drive for 11 hours?"
He says "all the other guys have no problem with ..."
I says "You're either full of **** or you have a fleet full of narcoleptics".
He laughs, starts to say something & I said: "That or they lay there & try to sleep & then they drive dangerously tired all night because they're afraid of getting fired or something"
He says "hold on a minute"
He transfers the call to the big boss in Iowa. As soon as I heard his voice I said "what a chicken ****!"
He says "who's a chicken ****?"
I says "(Kansas guy)"
He says "why"
I says "cuz he aint' got the balls to argue with me"
He says "over what?"
I says "Politics. he's a huge Obama fan"
He says "or this load out of Holcomb?"
I says "that too"
He says "what's the problem?"
I says "I just woke up & drove a measly stinkin' 3 hours & now he wants me to go back to sleep so I can drive all night".
He says "Most guys can do that, it's called trucking"
I said "It's called bull****"
He says "call it what you want, hold on... " (I hear typing) "looks like it's blah blah blah miles to blah blah blah if you finish your 10 there in Wichita you can blah blah blah then blah blah blah"
I says "either take me off this load or work it out so someone else can meet me in Omaha & take it cuz if I'm gonna be dispatched on this load I'm driving there now, during the day, ... when I'm wide awake, and safe"
He says "call (dumbass in Iowa) in the morning & let us know where you're at, I gotta go"
I says "ok, now was that so freakin' complicated?"
He says "you over-complicate things sometimes"
I says "only cuz your dispatchers are ****ing retards"
He says "yeah we're all retarded here in Iowa"
I says "and Kansas & Virginia too. But yeah, Iowa's the worst. Oh by the way, your trucks suck too"
He says "ok bye-bye"

-click-

Ok so now I'm 206 miles away from where I was earlier, parked near the Tyson crap-hole in western Kansas & I'm still not tired enough to sleep. The Ducks never sleeps. Unless I'm extremely tired, which I'm not.

that would get me fired lol

 

[Duck]

that would get me fired lol

I talk that way to him all the time.

I think he likes it.

 

[krelithous]

I talk that way to him all the time.

I think he likes it.

maybe he's into

 

[Duck]

maybe he's into

No I'm pretty sure he just thinks I'm being sarcastic when I'm not.

I told them guys I'm nothing more to them than a recovery driver for when one of their pieces of **** gets abandoned in the Chicago area. And sometimes I cover for the drivers with young kids so at least one of them can be home on Christmas. They always seem to think I'm "back" when I'm not.

I'm not trucking. I just happen to be driving one OTR at the moment because getting a truck from Lake Station, IN to Sheldon, IA involved going to Virginia then Kansas.

I'm crabby at the moment. And I like being crabby. It's fun. I get to tell people to go **** themselves when normally I'm too nice to talk like that.

Oh, and @Sinister is drunk. I told him he should get on here & drunk-post because he's even better at being crabby than I am but I think he might've fallen asleep.

 

[krelithous]

No I'm pretty sure he just thinks I'm being sarcastic when I'm not.

I told them guys I'm nothing more to them than a recovery driver for when one of their pieces of **** gets abandoned in the Chicago area. And sometimes I cover for the drivers with young kids so at least one of them can be home on Christmas. They always seem to think I'm "back" when I'm not.

I'm not trucking. I just happen to be driving one OTR at the moment because getting a truck from Lake Station, IN to Sheldon, IA involved going to Virginia then Kansas.

tats the way to do it with some of these idiots you have to be the boss and they have to be the employee or they will walk all over you. so you just do recoveries then and cover for one of the drivers during the holidays so that one of em can be home with there family that's good of you. I always tell my boss i'm here physically and not mentaly.

 

[Duck]

tats the way to do it with some of these idiots you have to be the boss and they have to be the employee or they will walk all over you. so you just do recoveries then and cover for one of the drivers during the holidays so that one of em can be home with there family that's good of you. I always tell my boss i'm here physically and not mentaly.

I got better things to do at the moment than trucking, actually.

It's something that normal people would find extremely boring but it's gonna pay me a whole heapin' ****load of money.

 

[krelithous]

I got better things to do at the moment than trucking, actually.

It's something that normal people would find extremely boring but it's gonna pay me a whole heapin' ****load of money.

can't say that I blame you there duck. with shit pay and all of the stupid laws and regs I don't know why anyone would want to do it anymore. so you get paid more as a recovery driver

 

[Duck]

can't say that I blame you there duck. with **** pay and all of the stupid laws and regs I don't know why anyone would want to do it anymore. so you get paid more as a recovery driver

A little more. Not much. Regular pay for the loads I haul, ... just a bonus for the recovery & another bonus if I have to hitch-hike across Iowa & Illinois to get back home.

 

[krelithous]

A little more. Not much. Regular pay for the loads & I haul, ... just a bonus for the recovery & another bonus if I have to hitch-hike across Iowa & Illinois to get back home.

the heck with that they best get my ass there if they want there truck back I refuse to hitch-hike

 

[8978]

I says "Politics. he's a huge Obama fan"

Give him my email address please.

 

[Tazz]

I was listening to a couple guys at the Shelbyville plant whining today about waiting for loads, no sleep, overnight delivery etc etc etc

All I could think was "Reason number 1,546,723 why I am glad I do not haul Reefer"

Then I saw the Murfreesboro drug badge and couldn't stop laughing .

I thought he was gonna pull me over.

 

[Injun]

I'm crabby at the moment. And I like being crabby. It's fun. I get to tell people to go **** themselves when normally I'm too nice to talk like that.

 

[krelithous]

I was listening to a couple guys at the Shelbyville plant whining today about waiting for loads, no sleep, overnight delivery etc etc etc

All I could think was "Reason number 1,546,723 why I am glad I do not haul Reefer"

Then I saw the Murfreesboro drug badge and couldn't stop laughing .

I thought he was gonna pull me over.

One more reason and the stank and slaughter houses. You know they kill em during the day and freeze em at night. And the grocery warehouses have the most fucked up hours 2 am 3 am 4 am 5 am etc

 

[Duck]

Got load early this AM. Am supposed to take it to some guy who's at home finishing up a 34.

Called him, got directions. The guy talks like Sling-blade.

I was writing it down as I was driving. It's apparent I'll have to call him back when I get close cuz I was just jotting down keywords.

He lost me at "the trail will curve right twice, then left 3 times, then you'll see a big trash pile.."

Yes, he said "trail" not "road."

Other words mentioned in these directions include "sewer tanks", "sign that says 'end of county maintenance'", "old rusty Willy's Jeep with no front wheels on it", "where hunters park their pickups" and "crick".

He said the road isn't really a road, it's a "more of a dirt path next to a crick".

Right now I'm downloading a YouTube video & I'm gonna extract it's audio to MP3 real quick & put it on my USB thumb drive in the stereo so I can play it when I get to this "dirt path next to a crick". It's the banjos from Deliverance. It'll make this whole adventure complete.

 

[Duck]

Ok so I went & did that. It was next to a sewer treatment plant but the water was frozen so it didn't stink. Wasn't as "Deliverance" as it sounded on the phone. It was a trailer park though.

Then I went 13 miles south back to I-70 where I'm vegetating at a truck stop while some guy is picking up flatbed freight in a van that I'm supposed to have in northwest Iowa sometime between 7-4 tomorrow. I figure since it's daytime & I can't sleep I'll just wait til the guy gets here, then sleep & get up at 6 & head up there.

I sent this text to the boss at 3:48 AM this morning:

If I get out of the truck at the wash dock I'll be banned from Tyson's Holcomb, KS facility? Really? It's that easy?
No such luck. I tried it & it didn't work. I guess nobody saw me hop out & shut the reefer off. (Guard at gate wanted to verify that it runs & I forgot it was running. I didn't want it running during the washout.)
Broken promises, LOL. Tyson wouldn't be cool enough to ban me from the Holcomb facility cuz they suck too much.​

A few hours later he called me but he was only wondering whether the wash bay was automated like the one in Dakota City. Apparently he didn't care that I attempted to get banned from the plant.

After I didn't get banned for getting out of the truck at the wash dock, I parked that empty trailer blocking a whole bunch of other empty trailers at the end of a row because some morons had blocked the end of the aisle with dropped trailers & I couldn't do a U-turn & I was too lazy to back up like 30 miles to the beginning of that row. I was hoping the spotter truck driver would find it & insist that I move it so I could get into a shouting match with him but that didn't happen either.

How exactly does one get banned from a Tyson plant??? Do I gotta start a freakin' bonfire in the parking lot with pallets or something?

Next time I'll try harder.

 

[Tazz]

Pee on the guardshack