Duck Pond Redneckery


Duck said:
Yes. And there will be laws that ban rear pockets from women's jeans below a certain size so they can't put their cell phones in their back pockets and ruin the view for us "pervy" old guys.

The plus size women's pants will be required to be redesigned so the whole thing is two sizes larger than the waist line. That way when they try to cram all that blubber into pants that are too tight, they won't be able to button them up and they'll have to get a larger one that's not gonna be skin tight.
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Super Hots™ should only be allowed to wear paint.
 
Duck said:
All the Super Hots™ will be rounded up and brought to live in a big island commune where they will be pampered and cared for by a misappropriation of tax dollars, and only me and my elite guests & cabinet members will have access to it.
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Do I get a badge for access or what? I'ma need an all access 24/7 pass. And validated parking.
 
Last edited:
Electric Chicken said:
Do I get a badge for access or what? I'ma need an all access 24/7 pass. And validated parking.
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It'll be an island. A very isolated one in the equatorial Pacific. So I don't know what you mean by "parking" unless you're going to buy a boat suitable for open ocean travel.

We can probably get you a role on the island though.

Maybe I'll put you in charge of ordering the "uniforms" for the maid service.

I'll be in charge of making the messes for the maids to clean up.
 
Duck said:
It'll be an island. A very isolated one in the equatorial Pacific. So I don't know what you mean by "parking" unless you're going to buy a boat suitable for open ocean travel.

We can probably get you a role on the island though.

Maybe I'll put you in charge of ordering the "uniforms" for the maid service.

I'll be in charge of making the messes for the maids to clean up.
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In conclusion, you're as sick as I am.
 
Duck said:
At my local Walmart there's an employee, a big fat white guy with a huge afro and he always wears a dress or a kilt or something.
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when we were in ca they workers were all from india:eek:. id'e rather use amazon get it next day and no dealing with peoples BS
 
krelithous said:
when we were in ca they workers were all from india:eek:. id'e rather use amazon get it next day and no dealing with peoples BS
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Speaking of Amazon and India...

I delivered to an Amazon warehouse this morning and it took more than one "what!?!" over the intercom to understand what parking spot she assigned me to.



Back when I did them for pumpkin and with my authority and their own trailers, I talked to the humans in the shack.
 
389 Hood said:
Mister Cabinet Minister Sir...Would you please ban ALL tattoos on females?
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Only the hot chicks.

Nobody cares if fat chicks want graffiti all over the blubber they'll be required to cover up.

Tattoo removal for females will be provided for "free" by the tax victims.
 

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