Duck Pond Redneckery
- Thread starter Duck
- Start date
Electric Chicken
Well-Known Member
Yes.Did you think it actually says "Duck" on my birth certificate?
of course not, dickhead....Did you think it actually says "Duck" on my birth certificate?
we all know on the birth certificate
your first name is: Quack,
middle name is: Quack,
and last name: Duck...
doh......
PS....glad, happy, and laughed my ass off, that the Mrs DUCK, bitched at the nurses.......she's coming along fine, even though, i never knew she had such a "fowl" mouth.......
Duck
Sarcastic remark goes here
No actually she's super sweet and polite... Unless she's pissed off.She must be a handful in normal circumstances.
At this rehab program at St Joseph in Joliet, they only do physical therapy 5 days a week. So she's recovering faster than they can keep up with, but these two days of nothing but sitting in bed are detrimental. And I'm not allowed to get her out of the bed to the bathroom or to walk her up and down the hallway when she's feeling energetic. It's plenty of reason for her to be pissed off.
At this point her only medical needs is someone giving her her medication and checking BP & temperature periodically. I can do that.
And I'm driving 62 miles a day on $3.20 gas and spending my entire days with her, neglecting the lawn and everything else. They can do physical therapy 3 miles away in Manteno. (I just don't know how the occupational & speech therapy). She would be better off at home doing outpatient PT.
I'm going to be kind of "stern" with them during this "team meeting" this morning and tell them they need to accelerate the program, AND do their little "family training" so I can help her to the bathroom and take her for walks in the hallway.
Because it's such a complicated task.. A petite 90 lb teenage girl can do it but not me? Or a 70 year old granny? Or a 60 year old with Parkinsons? Or a pregnant woman?
"but they're skilled nurses"
Yeah because it's so friggin' complicated walking next to somebody and staring at a cell phone like the pregnant one was doing yesterday.
mndriver
curmudgeon extraordinare
I know mom isn’t included in those meetings. My dad, brother, and me with staff.
mom gets the same way with her being told she has to use her walker as well.
As pissed as she is getting, she needs to keep it in check and not chew on staff. All those outbursts get recorded and passed on to the next facility.
glad she’s turned around like this too.
Electric Chicken
Well-Known Member
Thanks for making me choke up, BRIAN.
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it's the concrete dust in your cab....dumbass.
Uncle Birchy
Well-Known Member
When she gets home she gonna be like that too ..Tonight's update on Sarah:
She's tired of being in the hospital. Tired of being told she can't get out of bed without staff present, and staff takes a while to answer the call button then it takes a while for them to actually get to the room.
Today around 4 pm she got mad and went to the bathroom completely on her own without the walker because she hit the call button and didn't get a response right away.
I got up but she moved so quickly she was already in the bathroom before I could get around the stupid wheelchair that was in the way.
Bed alarm went off and the nurse came running in while she was on the toilet and told her she can't get out of bed on her own, fall risk, blah blah blah.
She snapped at the nurse and yelled "I can fuckin do what I want. I gotta go to the bathroom and I'm sick of having to wait for a nurse and Brian's right here and there's no fuckin reason why he's not allowed to help me because he's twice as strong as any of you and there's no way he's gonna let me fall".
The nurse just walked out of the room and when she was done, I helped her back into the bed even though she didn't actually need any help.
The physical therapists are going too slow for her because they're scared of liability due to her low blood pressure even though cardiology & neurology at Rush said that as long as she is asymptomatic (no dizzy or lightheadedness) she can do physical therapy.
With the walker, she's slow and doesn't have a wide stance. Almost like she's trying to walk a tightrope, but when she got up to go to the bathroom all pissed off, she walked normally. Not slow, not stumbling. Perfectly normal.
So, physically and neurologically she's doing REALLY WELL.
But understandably she's tired of being in the hospital. She's been in 4 different facilities now, twice at Rush. She hasn't been home since the stroke July 9th. She misses her cat. She hasn't seen the tomato plants since they were less than a foot tall, except in a video call while she was catatonic in the nursing home.
She has every right to bitch about it, even though it's not the fault of these nurses.
At 6pm her sister showed up.
Sarah's mood quickly changed and she was laughing and making fun of the nursing staff at St Joseph.
Unlike the nurses at the other two hospitals, these ones seem to have the personality of a door knob.
While she was making fun of the older nurses, she had to pee so she hit the call button.
A 30- something CNA came in with a really cute little teenage trainee. This girl couldn't possibly be a day over 18 if that's the minimum age requirement to be a CNA. She looks like she's 13 or 14, probably 90 lbs. Cute as a button.
Sarah took one look at her and said "What the fuck is this? Brian's not allowed to help me to the bathroom but this fuckin ten year old can do it? Is this like bring your daughter to work day or something?"
Sarah's sister and I both nearly fell out of our chairs laughing.
Yeah we have a "meeting" tomorrow at 11 am with the doctor and the nurses and physical therapists to discuss her progress and her projected discharge date.
I can't wait.
Here @Duck on the Oldies Station they played this and I thought of you guys..
Ya might wanna "recite" it because probably gonna "Need It" atleast till she gets back to "Normal"..
Just say "Sarah" won't ya SMILE
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Uncle Birchy
Well-Known Member
Years ago @Mike was reading bathroom stall graffiti..
One day he was taking a dump and posted Who's "StaceyQ"..
Now @Sinister had a similar story although this hadda do with Sharpie Markers and on his routes and surface , wall, even phone booths some guy wrote his name on "everything" on Sharpie Market
Back in the Dark Ages when I was a Pharmacy tech, Prilosec (the stomach acid pill) was introduced to the drug market under the name Losec. Problem was, there was already a heart medication called Lasix on the market that needed very careful titration. Prescriptions were written by hand at the time and most doctors had absolutely terrible handwriting. Losec and Lasix were prescribed at about the same frequency. We often couldn't tell the difference looking at the prescription paper in front of us. We'd ask the patient what it was for. If they said, "Heartburn" we had to call the doctor's office to make sure the heartburn was caused by acid and not actual heart problems. The drug company added "Pri" to the beginning of the drug name Losec because of doctors' poor penmanship and patients' inability to understand the difference between heart problems and heartburn.
Because antidepressants can cause problems with other medications and interfere with neural processes. She had a stroke. They need her at baseline to see if she even needs them anymore. The stroke might have killed brain cells causing the depression.
All of my thyroid levels have tested "normal" but I always felt like shit. I would spend whole weekends huddled under a blanket on the couch, too cold and tired to do anything. I finally told my endocrinologist we should stop treating the lab report and start treating the patient. I was symptomatic hypothyroid with normal labs. I've been on thyroid meds for over a year and this is the first summer since I can remember that I'm comfortable with bare feet.
Tonic water? Has a small amount of quinine in it. Quinine is excellent treatment for cramps.
What's your excuse? Allergies?
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i ran out of raviolis...........dumbass.
Duck
Sarcastic remark goes here
When she gets home she gonna be like that too ..
Here @Duck on the Oldies Station they played this and I thought of you guys..
Ya might wanna "recite" it because probably gonna "Need It" atleast till she gets back to "Normal"..
Just say "Sarah" won't ya SMILE
I'll play that for her next time we're stuck in an elevator.
An old gray haired CNA at Riverside was singing this to her on August 5th while we were waiting for the transfer to the nursing home. He was playing it on his phone but singing along with parts of it. I can't listen to this song any more now.
Uncle Birchy
Well-Known Member
At what 61.5 mph?
Electric Chicken
Well-Known Member
Almost as fast as Schneider.
Uncle Birchy
Well-Known Member
I heard they go 65 now
Electric Chicken
Well-Known Member
Yeah they even finally turned up the local trucks. At first it was just a perk of being team. Then OTR. Then regional and then finally the day cabs.
It's hilarious how they'd write us up for "hammering down" to 63mph "because it's a safety issue" and now everyone can run 65 on cruise. I told them "I ain't stupid I know damn well it's fuel. But I'm getting well above the expectation so I don't wanna hear it."
That's how I got out of acknowledging their stupid writeups and never signed one.
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